Ask Mom
Kathryn Jones
Issue date: 2/3/10 Section: Campus
Mom,
Thank you for such an inspiring answer in your last column (Down in the Dumps). Just like this person, I too was feeling too old to be a student. Thank you for making me think differently now. Well here is my question:
I am a 32-year-old male. I got divorced about a year ago, even though there are still financial and assets issues waiting to get resolved, I decided to return to school a year ago. I am taking from 10 to 15 credits per semester and I work full time, but have barely enough money to pay for everything including my tuition and lawyer fees. My financial situation has pushed me to move to my parent's house. I help them pay for the utilities and groceries and help as much as I can around the house. I have been living with them since I got divorced and this makes me feel sometimes like a dependent person (like a loser). I feel ashamed saying that I live with my parents. And with these economic times, I feel really frustrated with myself thinking that I probably need to quit school again and find my own place. My self-esteem is really low because of this situation. I need your advice on this.
Sincerely,
Frustrated Divorcee
Dear Frustrated,
First, let me say that I commend you for not giving up following your divorce. You are attending school, and you know how I feel about that. School is a difficult choice, even in the best of circumstances. I also like that, because you have had to move in with your parents because of financial reasons, you haven't given up on helping with what you can. You should be commended for helping with utilities and groceries, etc.
My question to you is: What do your parents think about you moving in with them? Are they supportive? Are they doing all they can to help you to move forward in your life and at the same time do you feel as if you are doing all you can as an individual?
If you say yes to both of these questions, I would suggest that you continue living with your parents. As you say, times are hard right now, and if you can continue school, that better job is sure to be in your imminent future. Quit now and you may never go back. And you probably already know what that means for future work.
Thank you for such an inspiring answer in your last column (Down in the Dumps). Just like this person, I too was feeling too old to be a student. Thank you for making me think differently now. Well here is my question:
I am a 32-year-old male. I got divorced about a year ago, even though there are still financial and assets issues waiting to get resolved, I decided to return to school a year ago. I am taking from 10 to 15 credits per semester and I work full time, but have barely enough money to pay for everything including my tuition and lawyer fees. My financial situation has pushed me to move to my parent's house. I help them pay for the utilities and groceries and help as much as I can around the house. I have been living with them since I got divorced and this makes me feel sometimes like a dependent person (like a loser). I feel ashamed saying that I live with my parents. And with these economic times, I feel really frustrated with myself thinking that I probably need to quit school again and find my own place. My self-esteem is really low because of this situation. I need your advice on this.
Sincerely,
Frustrated Divorcee
Dear Frustrated,
First, let me say that I commend you for not giving up following your divorce. You are attending school, and you know how I feel about that. School is a difficult choice, even in the best of circumstances. I also like that, because you have had to move in with your parents because of financial reasons, you haven't given up on helping with what you can. You should be commended for helping with utilities and groceries, etc.
My question to you is: What do your parents think about you moving in with them? Are they supportive? Are they doing all they can to help you to move forward in your life and at the same time do you feel as if you are doing all you can as an individual?
If you say yes to both of these questions, I would suggest that you continue living with your parents. As you say, times are hard right now, and if you can continue school, that better job is sure to be in your imminent future. Quit now and you may never go back. And you probably already know what that means for future work.
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